Food, Candy, and Other Gift Ideas...

Alright all you care-package senders, after many a conversation with my fellow volunteer-mates in places including but not limited to late night medical stays, out of site hostel stays, 4 hour bus rides, and 2 hour phone conversations (thanks PC!), I have compiled a list of items that we groan, moan, and ache for, simply because it does not exist or is out of our price range in this country. If you want to send a package to a PCV in Nicaragua, follow this list and it will positively put a smile on that hippie you sent it to…
1. Peanut Butter (Don’t deny the magicalness that is PB and whatever)
2. Honey (Holy crap… it’s so good AND it’s a replacement for sugar when cooking)
3. Cooking Spices (Anything to get that fried taste out of our mouths)
4. Snacks (Get Creative. I like Stauffer’s Original Animal Crackers. Other Ideas include cheese-it’s, teddy grahams, candy that won’t melt, mixed nuts, granola bars, and Clif bars…hells yea)
5. Dried fruit (…. Sorry, I just drooled on my computer… I like dried mangos and craisins… *wink*)
6. Mac-n-Cheese (Yea, there’s a reason I’ve eaten this crap since I was a newborn… it’s frigen delicious)
7. Tea (Putting leaves in boiling water since the beginning of fire…)
8. Coffee… correction… good coffee (And if you want to gain crazy bonus points, send your volunteer a French press. I was lucky enough to have a RPCV visit a few weeks ago, and he brought me one, and now I’m going to put his name in my will. Thanks Greg!)
WE’RE TAKING A BREAK FROM FOOD NOW BECAUSE MY STOMACH IS GROWLING AND I THINK IT WOULD BE BEST TO MOVE ON FROM THIS TOPIC FOR HEALTH REASONS.
9. Cooking supplies (Dammit… I’m still on food. But seriously, whisks, ladels, wooden spoons, spatulas, vanilla extract, measuring cups, coffee mugs [sometimes I drink coffee from plastic cups, seriously], you name it and any volunteer would be happy to receive it)
10. School Supplies (Markers, pencils, pens, paper, etc… These things are easy enough to come by, but they get lost, stolen, borrowed indefinitely, and it adds up quick)
11. Books and Magazines (HOWEVER, 1 crossword puzzle book, 1 sudoku book, and/or 1 word search book is enough. I don’t need eleven…. What the hell am I gunna do with eleven word search books?)
12. Underwear, tanktops, flip flops, socks (This climate is brutal. And if the climate doesn’t destroy your crap, the bugs will. And if the bugs don’t destroy your crap, then a jagged piece of metal in the bus seat will. And if you are lucky enough to avoid scrap metal your whole service, then you will be so sick of your clothes that you will just rip them up yourselves)
13. Why is thirteen an unlucky number anyway?
14. Sheets and pillow cases, oh! And Towels!
15. CD’s or any music really and movies (Justin Beiber or Beaber or Beeber… sorry, Nicaragua made me hate your music)
16. Starbucks Instant Coffee (This does in fact deserve a number of its own)
17. Plastic bags (Ziplock, all sizes… throw in some Tupperware while you’re at it)
18. Pictures, Pictures, Pictures (We miss you. We love you. We want to see your pretty face)
19. Where my females at? Tampons (Can I say that on this blog? Well I did. Sorry family members who think I am still a small infant child, and all the men who read this, but this is a VITALLY important part of life and they just don’t have these, shall we say, utensils? in this country. In fact, if you are sending a care package to a female volunteer, just throw a pack in for good measure)

Just in case there are some of you care-package senders out there who think that the above list is bogus and that you would much rather send a gift from the heart or some other muscle, here is a list of What NOT to send… ever:
1. Pet cactus (I don’t even… I don’t even know)
2. Sunscreen, medicine, floss, bug spray (Don’t get me wrong, I love this stuff, but we get it for free from the PC. So if you want to send stuff along the safe and hygienic line, send stuff like tooth paste, deodorant, toothbrushes, and nail polish remover, just as some ideas)
3. Money, electronics, jewelry (Unless you want to see how cool it feels when someone jacks your stuff)
4. Eleven Sudoku/cross word puzzle/word search books (See number 11 above… p.s. that number 11 thing was totally on accident. Ha!)

You’re smart people, you know how to take ideas and roll with them, be creative, but don’t be dumb. If you know a PCV or just want to send a package to gain awesome status (there is an awesome scale by the way, in case you didn’t know), send it to the address on this blog (one of the first posts, labeled “address”) and hopefully it will get to your PCV within 2 to 6 weeks. I hope this information has been as helpful as it has been entertaining. Peace. Aleia.

(Pics:My house, shower area, washing board/dishwashing center, backyard, and a giant yuca which I fried and tastes just like a french fry...mmmm. I still can't really cook, dammit.)

You’re Fatter and Whiter...

I love being in a country where honesty flourishes like the butterflies. I recently took a vacation to Arizona to see my family for Christmas and New Years, and as predicted, I ate everything that was within reach. A warning to the wise, food poisoning is more probable when eating a variety of different foods at large quantity. I think you can imagine what happened. However, it appears that I, the fragile flower, can and will survive any storm. So bring it on life, cuz I’m gunna rock you like a hurricane.
Two weeks later, I got back to Nicaragua, and the first thing I thought was, “F**k it’s hot.” I mean, it was 30 degrees in AZ, THIRTY! Granted I am closer to the equator, and okay... it wasn’t too terribly caliente, but the shock factor was enough to confuse the hell out of my already delicate system. I walked with my 2 backpacks and one duffel suitcase from the airport to the highway, a staggering 50 feet, and waved my hand for a bus. This is the Nica signal for “stop, here I am, pick me up:” Put your right arm straight out in front of you, parallel to the ground (suck on that high school math class, I remember what parallel is, oh and perpendicular too… what’s up!). Lift your arm up so your elbow is near your head, keeping it erect (wink), with your hand extended. Next, wing your arm down to your right leg. Repeat over and over until bus, taxi, truck, mototaxi, tricycle, etc stops. For emergencies, do the arm-flap rapidly, like you’re trying to fly away (Note: Do NOT use 2 arms, you’ll look like a freak). This is what happened:
Bus 1: Finger shake, aka, “No no no little miss gringa.” –DAMN-
Bus 2: Not going to where I want... DAMN
Bus 3: UnFO…. No frigen way am I getting on that thing.
Bus 4: Success!!!
The bus ride was easy enough. I drove for 2 hours and 15 minutes, switched buses, waited for 20 minutes, and finished my journey another 45 minutes until I got to my site.
That night I visited my old host family. I was as content as one could be after leaving a life full of hot showers and Italian food restaurants. And that’s when it happened, when I realized what I had come back to. My host sister announces, “Look, she came back fatter and whiter.” Now, if you ever visit Nicaragua, you must realize beforehand that this is not an insult. Life here is much more black and white. Short or tall. Nice or mean. Bone-ass skinny or Fatty Mcfatfat. I am in the “gordita es bonita” category, and I’m pretty content. I responded, “Yea. I ate a lot there.” =)
So, what’s the moral of the story?  Don’t get food poisoning? The Scorpions is one of the most rockin’ awesomest bands ever!? Curvy is scurvy? How the frick should I know? This isn’t a story, this is my life. I’m signing out, reminding everyone who reads this to smile, laugh, and karate-chop everything that life throws at you. Peace! ~Aleia~
(Pics: Adriana my neighbor helping me paint my mural in my house, me in my artistic frenzy, fun at home with my family and friends, and a toucan made out of a tire which was one of the winning products at the National Business Competition of 2010)